


Beloved Darkness

by Shadow_Dancer



Series: Beloved [3]
Category: Fable - Fandom, Fable 3 - Fandom
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Angst and Feels, Angst and Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Gratuitous Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Incest, Power Dynamics, Power Play, Romance, Rough Sex, Series, Sibling Incest, Smutty, Table Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-21
Updated: 2014-07-21
Packaged: 2018-02-09 18:57:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1994148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadow_Dancer/pseuds/Shadow_Dancer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>We're not just at war with each other. We're also at war with ourselves. But I still crave his darkness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beloved Darkness

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! Thanks for sticking by me even during a lag, hah. The past year has been a mess and a half and it's taken a lot of my focus.  
> Part 4 will be up sometime. Soon I hope. ;)

He is going to destroy me. How, I do not know. He would never hurt me intentionally or cause harm to me. But this....whatever this thing that exists between us is called- it is going to destroy us. And yet, I welcome it. I welcome the destruction- the embrace of darkness we find ourselves trapped in.

Since the encounter in the garden, we've avoided each other. I asked my maids to tell me where he was in order to avoid running into him. I spent my days training with Walter and many nights conversing with Elliot.

Elliot was wearing me thin- constantly chattering about his plans for us after the Ball, attempts to get me alone in the darkened rooms of the castle. His touches would grow more and more brazen to the point where Walter would subtly intercede.

"Why not just end things with the boy?" Walter said to me one day after sparring.

"It's...complicated. To say the least."

Walter sighed and looked around the room, searching for anyone else.

"It's not as complicated as you make it to be, Princess. If perhaps you weren't as stubborn as-"

"Watch your tongue, Sir Walter. Are you forgetting your place?"

I froze as Logan's voice echoed through the room. I began to nervously bite my lip. I heard Walter make his way to the door.

"Apologies, Your Grace. It won't happen again," he said as he closed the door behind him.

I imagined running my sword through Walter the next time I saw him. How could he leave me alone with Logan?

I stepped to the sword rack, trying to make it seem as if I were examining them. My heart began to skip beats as Logan walked behind me.

"Choose a sword,"

He wanted me to spar with him? Gods, please no. Please. I can't be around him. I thought of leaving, but instead, my traitorous hands reached out and chose my usual sword.

I stepped away and watched him examine the remaining swords before he settled on one.

"Just a friendly spar, dear Olivia. Although I do imagine you'd find it much more satisfying to draw blood."

I shot him a deadly glare. We hadn't spoken in a week and he decides to be cruel. I refused to take any blame for our encounter in the garden. He had started it. And I'll be damned to the shadows if I take any fault for that.

He made the first strike. I countered and parried his attacks, choosing to be on the defensive. This went on for a while until I felt the sting of the blade on my shoulder.

I stepped back and glanced at my shoulder. A dark line of blood stained my top.

"I thought this was just supposed to be a friendly spar, Logan."

I heard the blade cut through the air and blocked it, just barely.

"I only nicked your shoulder. You're the one who sought to harm me first. And harm me you did."

"What!?" I screamed, incredulous as his claim. He smirked and put his sword to the side, seemingly enjoying my fury.

"We are not finished" I spat, moving towards him with renewed vigor. Damn being on the defensive. I hurt him? I harmed him? How dare he.

He blocked my blow and we began the fight. His strikes had power to them but I had agility on my side.

"I harmed you first?! Pray tell, how? By refusing to be used as your whore? By telling you the truth about what you are? Cruel and corrupt?" I shouted, fury giving me strength. I saw a flicker of amusement in his eyes. He was goading me!

Finally, I managed to catch him off guard. The sword flew from his hand and he landed on his back, trying to catch his breath. I stood over him and pointed the sword to his throat.

"Do you yield?" I asked, my voice dark and deadly.

Logan looked up at me, a shadow of fear on his face.

I should have known it was a trick.

He grabbed my ankle and I lost my balance. I landed on my knee but within moments, he had me on my back- my sword thrown across the room and my hands above my head. He loomed over me but I refused to look away. I could feel the blood from my shoulder falling.

"I will always yield to you, Olivia. Always. Don't you see?" Logan whispered. He moved his hand to my cheek, where a tear had fallen and wiped it away. When did I start crying?

I wanted to turn away from him. I wanted to scream and yell and curse him. But I couldn't.

I lifted my head as much as I was able to and kissed him- just barely brushing his lips. His face remained stony, but his grip has loosened. I lifted myself up further and kissed him again, grateful when I felt him kiss me back.

His kiss wasn't gentle. It was desperate. He released my hands and cupped my face, drawing me closer. I wrapped my arms around him, his desperation feeding mine. He wound his hand through my hair as I clawed his back. He drew me into a sitting position and I began to undo the buttons to his tunic, eventually ripping them off. Logan disregarded the buttons on my top and simply ripped it off me. His hands immediately cupped my breasts as I traced my nails over his back, reveling as he trembled from my touch.

Like his kiss, his hands were not gentle. He held on to my breasts tightly, rolling and pinching my nipple. He nibbled the my neck, pulling the flesh between his teeth and moaning. I kept thinking of his hands- his calloused hands, hands that had the capacity for gentleness and roughness at the same time- to make things darker.

He moved to the other side of my neck as a hand trailed down my stomach. I moaned wantonly.

But then he stopped.

"Logan?" I whispered, wanting to keep going.

"....You need to have your shoulder looked at," he said, pulling away from me.

"It's fine. It can wait."

Logan sighed heavily and removed my arms from around him. He stood up and began to walk away.

"No. You do not get to do this again," I said as I stood up, not caring about my torn top or shoulder. He ignored me and reached for the door. I ran in front of him and the door, cutting him off.  
"Why do you keep doing this to me?" I asked, fighting back tears.

"We'll talk about this another time, Olivia."

"No! We're going to talk about this now. You just told me that you would always yield to me and in that same breath you walk away from me. Why?!"  
He said nothing. He wouldn't even look at me. I shook my head- I was disgusted with him. With myself. With the power he had over me.

I turned from him and opened the door myself, running to my chambers. I didn't look back this time.  
  
 

* * *

 

 

She asked me why. Why I kept doing this.

I don't have an answer any more. I love her. But I hate what I'm doing. I know the truth. I know I will always yield to her. If she asked me for the moon I would find a way to rip it from the night sky to give to her. She could ask of me impossible things and I would find a way to grant them to her.

Why do I still feel the need to get revenge? It has been weeks since the garden. Since I had her in my arms- willing and wanting me. I had the chance again and I stop. She has such power over me. And yet I feel the need to have dominion over her. After all, isn't control what monsters desire?  
Yes, I avoided her. Yes, I sought to make her jealous- all those whores I would take to my chambers. I would touch them but they would feel wrong in my hands. Their skin felt too unfamiliar and undesired. I could never look at them. I had to think of her. Always her. Always my Olivia. I didn't want the false passion of the ladies of the court. I wanted her, damnit!

Gods, what was she doing to me?

....What was I doing to her?  
I sighed heavily as I changed my clothes. I just needed to see her. To talk to her.

I just needed her.

I walked through the halls to her chambers. I didn't knock and just walked in.

She wasn't in her room.

My hands tightened into fists. So help me, if she were with that boy...

As I turned to search the castle for her, I heard light splashing of water. Quietly, I turned to the bathroom, gently opening the door.

There she was. Neck deep in water so hot the steam was clouding the room. Her eyes were closed and her hair surrounded her. Her face was so soft. So relaxed. Seeing her so soft, so vulnerable- I had to touch her. I walked softly behind her and kneeled. Her breathing was soft and steady. Had she fallen asleep?

My hands went to her temples, softly brushing the skin. She sighed quietly and tilted her head back. I gently began to rub her temples and stroke her hair. My beautiful Olivia- please. Please.

Her eyes opened slowly and I stopped, drawing my hands back. She turned to face me, no hardness in her face or eyes.

Why did she keep giving me so many chances? I know she doesn't love me. But she offers herself as a lamb headed to slaughter.

I swallowed as I saw the gash on her shoulder. To have hurt her in such a way- I was truly the monster she told me I was.

Dejectedly, I put my head on her shoulder. I hated myself.

"Rail against me. Hate me, slap me, destroy me. I can't bear your anger. Nor bear being the cause of it," I whispered.  
Her hands cradled my head and I felt relief. I hesitantly rapped my arms around her. For the first time in years, I felt myself crying. She held me closer to her, stroking my hair. I held her tighter in return, feeling more tears fall. She began to hum softly.

"I don't hate you. I never have, Logan. And I don't believe I ever will, though some would say I have reason to. You have too much of my heart," Olivia said, drawing my head up to face her. She gently brushed away my tears and smiled sadly.

"Logan, you're not just waging a war against Albion's enemies or threats. You have a war waging within yourself. Two halves of you are constantly at battle. What you desire and what you know, in your deepest of thoughts, is right and wrong. But trying to appease them both...this is what is going to destroy us."

"Us?"  
  
"I'm fighting this same battle. Heh. Maybe that's the power I have over you- you can sense that I'm fighting the same battle," she said as she stroked my face.

"What is it that you desire?" I whispered.

"You," she chuckled ruefully. "Everything about you. Even the darkness that you show."

I closed my eyes and brought my head to hers, foreheads touching. Her hands moved to my chest as I moved mine to cup her cheeks. She did know, or at least understand what was going through my mind- even moreso than myself. This is why I needed her. She understood me. She is the one thing that keeps me from losing myself in complete darkness.

Olivia kissed my forehead tenderly and stood, grabbing a robe from the small table beside the tub. She put in on and came to me, offering her hand. I took it and stood before her. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and embraced me. I wrapped my arms around her, feeling a sense of peace I hadn't felt in years. 

"It seems that no matter what, we're always going to desire what will destroy us," she whispered. I held on to her tighter, wishing more than anything we could have it both ways.  
  


* * *

 

Logan left the room after I spoke to him. After I was sure he was gone, I barred the door. I ran to my closet, grateful that he had no followed me in there. He would have found my pack if he had.

After the sparring match, I had run to my room and began to gather supplies. I made sure I had clothes, coin, and potions. I had plans to go to the armory at nightfall to take my weapons. I had to. I had to leave. Fault didn't belong to just one of us. It belonged to us both. We were both part of the equation. 

If I stay here, both of us were going to lose this fight. We'd be robbing each other of too much. And I couldn't do that to him. Not to my beloved monster. He said he couldn't bear me hating him, but I know he could live with hating me if it meant he'd be free. 

I dressed in simple traveling clothes- boots, a fitted shirt and fitted trousers. The sun was setting and dusk was overtaking the castle. I saw on my bed next to my pack and took out a letter and a small vial. I twirled it in my hand, the clear liquid reflecting my uncertainty. It wasn't poison. I wasn't planning on killing anyone or myself. It was just a sleeping aid from the castle apothecary. 

I closed my eyes tightly to fight my tears. I knew he wouldn't let me leave, but this would at least give me a good head start. I put the vial down and unfolded the letter.

_"Logan,_

_Please forgive me for this. We can't keep doing this to each other._  
      I don't have the strength to stop it directly. I don't have the strength to refuse you anymore.  
      So I'm taking the coward's way out.   
      Please forgive me, my beloved."

Tears clouded my vision as I refolded the letter. Still crying, I put the letter and vial in my pocket. I hid my pack again and took a deep breath as I unbarred the door. May the Gods forgive me for this.

Darkness had settled finally, moonlight peeking through the drapery of the halls. I made it to Logan's chambers and stood hesitantly. I could hear the crackling of the fire and saw his shadowed movements form underneath the door. Quickly, I wiped away any lingering tears and took a deep breath. I opened the door.

Logan lifted his head sharply as I closed the door. I looked down and leaned against the doors, trying to keep myself together. I heard his chair move and I looked up. Instead of coming to me, he had his back to the table, his hands gripping the edges. His face wasn't sinister. Or cruel. He looked...almost hopeful.  I began to bite my lip nervously as I slowly approached him. I kept my eyes on his, searching for rage, anger, fury- anything but that damned hopeful look. I reached out my hand to touch his cheek and smiled softly when he closed his eyes. He still kept his hands on the table, but I saw him grip it harder when I touched him, almost as if he were trying to restrain himself. Then I finally understood. He had been waiting for me. For me to come to him. Willingly. This was the power that I held over him. He wanted me to come to him. To trust him enough.

I took my hand back and stepped closer to her, our bodies nearly touching. I put my hands over his and gently drew them away from the table. I stood taller and and began to kiss his jaw. He was trembling from restraining himself. I brought his hands to my waist, encouraging him. With his hands now on my waist, I moved closer to him and brought my hands to his shoulders.   
  
"Logan," I spoke softly. "Please look at me." Logan opened his eyes. They were dark with desire.

I brought my lips to his and kissed him, drawing his lower lip in my mouth. He moaned and brought my body flush against his, moving one of his hands to grip my head to him. His free hand moved underneath my shirt and he began to lightly scratch me.

He broke the kiss and released my hair. I felt both of his hands move to the hem of my shirt.

"It seems I've forgotten how much you enjoy using those teeth, Olivia," he whispered huskily into my ear. In a swift motion, he lifted my shirt off and chuckled.

"No corset or underclothes, my dear?" he said, spinning me around so my back was to the table. He swept an arm out and cleared it.

"It would appear so," I said, fisting his shirt in my hands. I brought him back to me and began nibbling on his ear. He lifted me up and sat me on the table, spreading my thighs with his knee and standing between them. His hands began to massage my breasts, making me whimper and moan in pleasure.

"I love how your hands feel on me," I said to him as I began to unbutton his shirt. He moaned as I ghosted my nails over his skin, his grip tightening on my breasts and making me moan louder. Logan shrugged off his shirt and brought his mouth to my nipple. His tongue flittered across it and he even gripped it softly with his teeth.

"Fuck," I whimpered softly. Logan bit down with enough force to make me cry out again.

Logan laughed darkly. He kissed his way up to my neck, his hand replacing where his mouth was.

"I never would have guessed what a dirty mouth you have," he whispered into my ear as I felt his hand begin to loosen the ties on my trousers. They were unlaced in moments and he began to ghost his fingers across my mound. His free hand continued to caress my breast as he kissed my neck. I gripped the table tightly, needing him. I shifted my hips to try to have him stroke me but he removed them. I whimpered.

"I'll make you a deal, sweet one." He rolled my nipple between his fingers and lightly pinched. I started to tremble from want.

"The deal is, I will give you what you want- in what ever way you want it. But you need to talk to me. Tell me what you want," he whispered, stilling his hands but kissing my neck.

"I want you," I said immediately. He only chuckled.

"And have me you will....but only if you choose to honor your end of the deal."

"I...I want you to touch me," I said hesitantly.

"Where?"

"My breasts." His hands cupped them, but he didn't do anything.

"Gods..." I whined.  
  
"I'm touching you, love."

"I want you to massage them." My heart began to race. I realized what he wanted then. I kissed him fiercely and lowered my hand to stroke him through his trousers. Sweet Gods, he was so hard.

"Logan, I want you to fuck me. I want to fall apart around you- around your fingers, around your tongue, around your cock. I want you inside me. I need you inside me. Please."

At that moment, I realized I had unleashed a hidden side to my beloved monster. A more primal side. Something so beautifully dark I couldn't wait to be consumed by it.

Logan growled and claimed my lips with his- sucking and biting. The force took me by surprise and nearly pushed me down to the table. He tore off my pants with urgency, his eyes locked on mine the whole time. He kneeled in front of me and brought my hip closer to the edge of the table. He began to stroke my slit gently, groaning when he felt how wet I was. I moaned loudly and leaned back, closing my eyes.

"No."  
  
I sat up immediately, dreading what was to come. Logan smirked at me and started to tease my entrance.  
  
"I want you to watch me fuck you," he said, slipping one finger inside me. I fought the urge to throw my head back and watched him. He smiled darkly as he continued to pump one finger inside me, then two. I felt my nails dig into the table as I tried to keep watching Logan. I could feel myself tighten around him and began to moan loudly. He lowered his head and began to lick my labia, starting to increase the speed of his fingers. I began to gyrate my hips to meet him and I was rewarded with a long, slow lick across my nub. I started to moan and whimper all at once. In moments, I felt myself spasming around him. I tilted my head back and screamed as I felt him bring to to orgasm. I fell back on the table as my body was overtaken by spasms. Logan still pumped his fingers inside me and he began to flicker his tongue against my nub. I started to feel my body tighten again. 

I began to repeat his name desperately. I felt so tightly wound that I was afraid I would break. Logan crooked his fingers inside me again and brought me to my release. My heart was beating wildly and I was still trembling. I felt Logan remove his fingers from me and saw him hover over me, the intense and primal look still on his face. With what little strength I had left, I sat up and kissed him hungrily, running my hands down his body. To my surprise, he was all ready nude. I moaned in delight as I felt his cock on the inside of my thigh. 

He broke away from the kiss and put his palm on my cheek. His eyes were dark and lusty. With one fluid motion, he entered me. Moaning, I wrapped my legs around his hips and encouraged him to enter me fully. His eyes had closed and his mouth was open in a silent moan.

"So fucking tight," he said through his teeth, teetering on the edge of control and abandon.

Logan then crashed his lips to mine with a renewed force. 

This was not gentle by any means. He pumped himself inside me hard, pulling my hair back, biting my neck. I dragged my nails across his back, having him bite me harder when I did so. He moaned throatily and kissed me again, pushing me down on my back. He still kept his speed as he began to bite me down to the collarbone and to my breasts. I never knew how good pain could feel. I wrapped my hands through his hair and began to pull. He rewarded me with a hard nip that had me screaming in twisted pleasure. I felt his nails scratch down me lightly and screamed again when he began to rub my clit. I could feel my orgasm begging for release.

"Olivia..." Logan groaned deeply, his face contorted in a mask of pain as he tried to hold himself back. Hearing the way my name sounded on his lips brought me to that release. I felt myself coming over and over, even when he removed his hand. Even when he held my hips in place and continued to drive himself in to me. I whimpered his name and felt him release inside of me, moaning my name loudly. 

Logan fell on to me, his legs still managing to support his body. We were both covered in sweat and each other. I tilted my head to him and kissed him languidly. He kissed me back and brushed my hair from my face. He lifted me from the table , still inside me but going soft, and brought me to the bed. I had my legs still wrapped around him and pulled him down with me. He chuckled and obliged.

I could feel tears start to build up again. I wasn't ashamed of what I'd done this time, however. I was ashamed of what I was about to do.

"Is that tonic still where you put it?" I asked, my voice soft.

"Yes. I'll get it," he said as he withdrew himself from me.

"No, I'll get it. I think my legs need some circulation anyway," I said, flashing him a small smile. I stood up shakily and leaned against the canopy frame for support. I saw where my trousers had fallen and made myself stumble. I quickly grabbed the vial of sleeping potion and made my way to the table, chuckling.

"At least I didn't have to go down a flight of stairs," I said to him over my shoulder. I jumped when I felt him lift me into his arms from behind.

"Thanks the Gods for that," he said, returning my laugh as he kissed me on my cheek. He carried me to the chaise in front of the fire and went to gather the tonic and some cups.

I kept trying not to cry. This would be the last time I would be with him again. The last time I'd feel his caresses, his kisses. But I had to do this.

He brought two cups to me and poured the tonic in one. When he turned his back to grab a skin of wine, I quickly poured the sleeping potion in his cup and drank the tonic from mine. He turned around and poured a healthy amount of wine into both the cups, not noticing the drugged cup. 

He reached for the drugged cup, a smile in his eyes. This...this was the happiest I've ever seen him. He didn't look tired or weighed down. He looked unburdened. Relieved.

"Oh, sorry. This is yours," I said, quickly withdrawing the drugged cup from him. I offered him the undrugged one in its place.

"No it's not, Olivia. The one that you took- the one with the sleeping potion in it- is mine."

I nearly dropped both cups in shock. No...how? How did he know? He smiled at me sadly and sat next to me, taking the drugged one from me and holding it in his hand.

"After earlier...the castle apothecary came to me, asking how you were sleeping. He assured me the sleeping potion was potent enough for you to sleep soundly through the night. And I saw your pack in the closet earlier today. You forgot to close it," he said. My jaw dropped as he spoke.

"That's why I was still awake. I was trying to think of something- anything I could do to make you stay. To make you feel at peace here again."

"Logan..." I whispered, tears now falling freely. I watched him bring the cup to his lips and prepare to drink it. I quickly lapped it away and threw my cup to join his. I brought my knees to my chest and hugged them, ashamed and confused.

"Look at me."

I shook my head no and closed my eyes as tightly as I could.

"....Please."

The tone in which he said it made me open my eyes and lift my head to face him. He wasn't angry. Even though he should be.

"I would have drank from the cup, even knowing it would cause me to sleep. I'd wake up in the morning to an empty bed and nothing more than a note from you. Yes, I would have been angry. I would have raged through the castle, destroying everything I could get my hands on. But I would have still let you go."

"Why?" I sobbed, shaking from trying to hold myself together. He moved closer to me and lifted my chin so I could look him in the eyes.

"Because I love you."

I started crying harder. I slapped him. I hit my fists against his chest and he let me. When I stopped, he brought me to him, holding me tightly. I wrapped my arms around him and cried.

"That's the power you have over me. I care more for your happiness than my own selfish desires, my sweet."

I pulled away from him and wiped my face.

"What do you want, Olivia? Forget about right and wrong for one moment. Forget about pleasing someone else. For one moment, Olivia. What do you want?" he asked.

I don't know anymore. And I don't care. He's right- every decision I've ever made has been done in order to please someone else. To make someone else happy. But it's all I know.

"I want to stop fighting with myself. I want to stop hating myself for-" I stopped short. He knew what I was going to say. But he made no attempts to say it for me.

"Logan....I love you. And I hate myself for it."

He brought a hand to my face and stroked my cheek.

"That's how you feel, beloved. I need to know. What do you want?"

"I want to be with you. I want to be yours."

I stopped crying. Logan took me into his arms and carried me to the bed. He put me down and closed the canopy curtains.He lifted the duvet and joined me underneath it. I felt his hand stroke my leg and he placed it over his hip. I drew closer to him and he wrapped his arms around me.

"Right now, it's only us. Right here and right now," he said to me, kissing my forehead.

I was drained. Exhausted didn't even fully cover it.

But Logan was right. It was just us right here and right now.

Two souls hiding in the darkness.


End file.
